


Relief

by Inkelf



Category: Loki: Agent of Asgard
Genre: Angst, F/M, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, There's some sexytimes but it's 100 percent background to the angst, Verity is in this a little bit I promise, so much angst tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-24
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:08:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28945665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inkelf/pseuds/Inkelf
Summary: "If I survive, can I have more?""If we survive, if we succeed in undoing this... I'll be back to my rotten old self.""Oddly... That makes me want it all the more."Of course they had succeeded.They had been heroes.Takes place between Agent of Asgard issues #9 and #10, after the events of AXIS.
Relationships: Amora/Loki (Marvel), Loki (Agent of Asgard) & Verity Willis
Comments: 6
Kudos: 10





	Relief

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place between Agent of Asgard issues #9 and #10, after the events of AXIS.
> 
> I was honestly not sure how to rate this because it felt more M than T but not quite enough M to justify the rating... So hope no one is too disappointed there's not more to the sexytimes, heh. Focus is on angst and little else.

_"If I survive, can I have more?"_   
_"If we survive, if we succeed in undoing this... I'll be back to my rotten old self."_   
_"Oddly... That makes me want it all the more."_

Of course they had succeeded. 

They had been heroes. 

And then, because of said success, everything went back to the way it was supposed to be. The real heroes had returned, and the villains took the fall. 

Loki had no idea if the constant nausea in his stomach since the inversion had ended was a feeling like a hangover or like coming down off of a magically induced high, or something else. There were certainly other symptoms akin to a bad hangover-- the desperate desire to make everything stop and to return to the blurred pleasure of before was one. 

Another similarity to a night of drinking and bad decisions was the search for distractions, which thankfully Amora was more than willing to supply. 

They'd been doing more over the past few days than they had in a few centuries, in terms of coupling, but this time was different. Maybe not for her, Loki had no idea how she was handling this. That was probably something healthy people would have discussed, Loki thought as Amora's lips and teeth found his neck as he pressed her against the wall of his dark apartment. 

Any injuries they had sustained during the battle had been healed either by magic or the fact that Aesir just healed faster than other races, but Loki found he might not have minded if there had still been bruises to feel. Something under his lungs still felt bruised, like he'd been struck, and it hadn't gone away since Mjolnir had slipped from his fingers to fall to the surface of the moon. 

Some stories no one will believe. 

"Do you even want this?" Amora hissed, put out, and that's when Loki had realized he had stilled after pinning her back, his eyes closed and head tipped back and not even registering the scrape of her teeth on his skin. 

Letting out a long breath, he turned them both around so their positions were reversed. "You lead," he said, which she did with no need for second prompting. 

For someone desperate for a distraction, Loki found all his movements were rather automatic, even when their clothes were on the floor, even when they moved from the wall to the bed. He missed the drugged stupor they had both been in before, high on heroism and nobility with no time for wicked sisters or human best friends. 

It was the unwelcome thought of Verity and the guilt that had been harboring in his chest blossoming out like a sore bursting that switched Loki's apathy to sudden desperation to stop feeling-- what he didn't know, that's why he didn't want to think about it. He threw himself into the welcoming void of Amora's skin, and judging by her appreciative sounds she was definitely noticing the difference. 

So Loki hyper-focused on every sound, every shudder, every hitch in their breathing. Nothing else outside this. Nothing but skin on skin and him in her; certainly no thoughts of brothers or best friends or hammers or the people they had hurt under the name of heroism, and no lies. _Ngh, yes--_

That's what it was, really. _Like that, don't stop--_

He had been unable to tell lies. _Gods, fuck, more--_

And that was the biggest lie of them all. 

It was almost a disappointment to reach the height of pleasure, because then it was over, the fervor that had filled them had vanished leaving them breathless and shuddering and leaving Loki facing the fact that he knew exactly what he was feeling. 

Relief. 

It was relief in the pit of his stomach and sick hate in his chest over the fact. 

No more lies. The lie that he could ever be a hero like that was over, leaving them both back to their old rotten selves. 

"You're better like this," Amora murmured, ghosting her lips over his ear. 

Loki let out a long breath, tilting his head away. "You should go." 

He didn't pay attention to her huff of annoyance, or when she muttered something under her breath that sounded like a curse as she got up, redressing with a wave of her hand. 

Amora stopped at the door. "We're both better like this. We are who we are, there's no shame in that. There's only shame in pretending we're anything else." 

Loki did not respond, and he did not watch as she spun up a portal and stepped through. The green light faded, leaving him lying alone in the darkness. 

He didn't know how long he laid there. He didn't know what time it was when he finally rolled over onto his side, fishing his Stark phone out of the top drawer on his side table. 

_Can we talk?_

He stared at the words after he had typed them, as though if he stared at them long enough they might send themselves. 

It was definitely later in the night -- or earlier in the morning -- than a decent friend would send a text, but his thumb finally strayed over the send button and hovered close enough to the screen that he finally relented and his pathetic excuse for attempt at contact was sent off into the wild to make its way down the hall of the apartment building to Verity. 

He wasn't expecting the typing bubble to appear so quickly, and he watched it with his breath in his throat, not exhaling until the return message appeared on his screen. 

_Yeah_

He hesitated a moment, nearly heady with relief, then sent, _Whenever you want to come over._

_I'm trying to get some sleep. See u in the morning._

If he had been on deserving to jest terms, Loki would have pointed out in response that it was morning technically. But he put the Stark phone on the table, curling up on his side and waited in the darkness for something that wasn't the screaming in his head to happen.

**Author's Note:**

> So I forgot about Loki's answer when Verity asked him about Amora in AOA #10 until after I had written this and a quip about raspberry dacquoise didn't fit the angst so oops. Canon in spirit if not the letter.


End file.
